Join The Impact: San Jose

This was originally posted to Calitics California Politics Blog.

About 2,000 people gathered at San Jose City Hall today as part of a nationwide day of protest against Prop 8 and for equal rights. We started by gathering in four locations - the San Jose Museum of Art, Metropolitan Community Church, St. James Park, and the Billy DeFrank LGBT Community Center. I'd carpooled in with my friend Ms. V and a friend of hers, and we started at St. James Park, handing out extra Vote No on Prop 8 signs left over from the campaign. Although we could have gone to the Mountain View rally closer to home, we'd chosen San Jose to be part of something bigger, and to be with our community from the DeFrank Center and the South Bay No on 8 campaign. Almost immediate we ran into Nan Coley, a friend and former colleague who had provided the inspiration for my blog post last night, Waiting for Proof. We continued handing out signs until we ran out, when I found more friends, the Shmilas, who I had introduced 12 years ago, and who were married on November 2. Ms. V ran into her ex and they caught up on their lives. And we ran into a straight couple active in PFLAG, who we'd met through the campaign. His sign (photo right) was so popular people kept asking him to pose for pictures and videos.

Then we were given the signal and started walking, and as we spread down the sidewalk we started to get an idea of how many of us had gathered. A news helicopter circled overhead as protestors converged on City Hall from the four starting places. The crowd included LGBT and straight, young and old, parents and kids, teachers and students, leaders and members of faith communities, Hispanic Americans, African-Americans, Asian Pacific Islanders, the full diversity of the San Jose community. We surrounded the fountains on the City Hall plaza as barefoot children played in the water. We chanted (2-4-6-8 Love does not discriminate! What do we want? Equal rights! When do we want them? NOW!). We strained to hear speakers like DeFrank Executive Director Aejaie Sellers, and cheered when cars passing by honked their horns in support.

The mood was mostly upbeat. Although I'd been nervous about a possible counter-protest, we met no resistance on our march to City Hall and we found none on the plaza. I later read in the San Jose Mercury News that there had been a handful of Yes on 8 protestors across the street, but from our vantage point at the bottom of the fountain they could be neither seen nor heard. The messages were positive. Although it was sorely disappointing that Prop 8 had passed, it had been defeated in Santa Clara County where the Knight Initiative had passed. Although many in the LGBT community had been stunned by the election results, that had mobilized our community across the country. Volunteers from the DeFrank Center circulated with clipboards to sign up volunteers ready to commit to fighting for marriage equality. They invited us to a community meeting on Monday night to plan next steps. As we stood in the sun and cheered and waved our signs, I forgot to be angry at those who had waited to volunteer until after Prop 8 had passed. We can only move forward, and this crowd appeared ready to do the work. Now if we can only hang on to that energy.

Waiting for Proof

"I also was deliriously happy when Barack Obama won the election. During his victory speech, I was awestruck at the eloquence and grace of this man who we need so much. He reminds me of Dr. King and a bit of JFK both of whom I greatly miss. I wept knowing this is an event of our times that matches no other."
— Nan Coley

My friend Nan went on to note that in those moments of victory an entire people, after generations of struggle, was lifted up. "I couldn’t be more proud and relieved right along with them." What she wrote next completely choked me up: "We, too, are waiting for our proof of belonging to the whole. One day it will happen and I hope I am here to experience it."

When MBW (My Beautiful Wife) and I first met almost 18 years ago, we never dared to think that we would be able to legally marry in our lifetimes. But when we stood in line all day in the rain on President's Day in 2004, and when we finally reached the San Francisco City Hall rotunda and heard those words, "By the power vested in me," we realized how much we wanted the rights, privileges and responsibilities of marriage. And when we were at last legally married in July of this year, we felt what we had been longing for: we felt equal.

Tomorrow is a national day of protest. Simultaneous rallies will take place all over the country in support of marriage equality and in protest of the same-sex marriage bans passed on November 4. We hope for a day of peaceful protest, solidarity, and engagement. And I personally hope we will focus on moving forward rather than on blame.

Nan has words of wisdom that apply here as well. "It is up to us to embody the measure of grace and pride that will show we will not quit and will not fail in our quest for equality with respect and decorum befitting citizens of America who deserve no less than anyone else."

I will try to keep those words in mind tomorrow as we walk to City Hall to show our resolve. But I know I will keep coming back to this one thought that Nan so perfectly expressed: "We, too, are waiting for our proof of belonging to the whole."